The Family Factor: Parenting around the binge drinking culture: Are ...

There were about 8 girls at the party and the birthday girl?s mother was one of those parents that wanted to be ?the cool mum?. We got to the party table and it was laden with chocolate, chips, cake, soda drinks and? alcohol. All for us! Yes, the mother purchased and served us alcopops.
The wrestling that went on in my mind, which I thought at the time was mine alone but realise now would have been happening to many of the girls at the party, was mammoth. The pressure was in fact more enormous than I had ever experienced in my teen years, because I did not have only peer pressure to contend with but I had a an adult both condoning and down right encouraging me to drink. I would not just lose face in front of my friends if I said no, but I became afraid of refusing someone that should represent maturity and safety. Comprising all the facets of power imbalance, coercion, corruption and hazardous encouragement, this incident was a form of child abuse. It is for this reason that I welcome?the announcement by the O'Farrell government. Their aim is to make it easier for police to fight the teenage booze culture by seeing adults face a maximum of 12 months' in jail, for supplying alcohol to any minor who is not their own child. I know that the drinking culture is a complex issue, however I welcome any intervention that stops our teens being put at further risk. Of course I know full well that teens can begin drinking for any number of reasons, however this is termed ?at risk? behaviour due to a primary need often underlying said behaviour. We now know that teenagers who have trouble coping with the stressors?of life such as; hormonal changes coupled with being bullied at school, home life struggles or other disruptions are more likely to abuse drugs and alcohol, engage in criminal activity, become sexually promiscuous, self-harm, engage in disordered eating and some may attempt suicide. Many of these behaviours are a form of self- medication as a vehicle for temporary relaxation or ?forgetting,? but research indicates that the earlier people start drinking, the more likely they are to drink heavily, experience cognitive impairment and develop a dependency on alcohol as they move into adulthood. Binge drinking, which is drinking to get drunk, is the most hazardous way of consuming alcohol.? Researchers from the University of California and Stanford University found binge-drink, defined as having four or more drinks for women and five or more for men, showed less activity in several brain regions than teetotal teenagers. Dr Susan Tapert found that these differences in brain activity were linked to worse performance on other measures of attention and working memory ability.? The greatest concern being that the negative effects of excessive drinking lingered long after the buzz from the alcohol was gone. In other words, the risk to cognitive and brain functions is enduring.?? It has also become far more socially acceptable for young women to drink in recent years than it was 20 years ago, which unfortunately puts girls at further risk of harm. What can parents do? 10 tips for parents: A study has found that teens with ?hands on? parents are far less likely to engage in risky behaviours.

The? 'tough love' style of parenting which sees a high level of warmth alongside forms of consistent discipline as proven to be the? most effective parenting style in the education of young people about drugs and alcohol.

1. Maintain boundaries - A teen without rules is a teen with much stress.?Although teens are no longer small children they are still far from being adults.
2. Teach problem solving and critical thinking skills without lecturing. Discussing issues that teenagers face gives ?names? to worries or concerns and opens up family communication.
3. Know where your children are and be involved with their friends parents. (Set up an alliance with other parents (so that you all look out for each others kids)
4. Agree with your child that to attend a party you will be calling the parents to make sure there is active adult supervision (parents sitting upstairs does not count).
5. Teens need to explore their own limits and abilities, as well as the boundaries you set, so plan for healthy risk taking activities (abseiling, blue hair, rock climbing)
6. Agree to a pick up your teen and their friends from parties or be waiting at the front door with a hot chocolate when they get home.
7. Decide on a code word that your teen can use if things are getting out of hand. This way they can ?save face? in front of peers. (e.g? ?I have a headache.? means ?Come and get me.?
8. Allow for consequences to be carried out if teens have overstepped the boundaries.
9. Develop a wide social network so that your teen has many different friends to hang out with. (This takes off the pressure of conforming to a negative peer group)
10. Actively seek an older mentor for your teen if you are struggling. Someone to listen, play sport or take them for a coffee.

Please seek professional help if behaviour is interfering with day-today functioning. i.e. school work, or relationships having deteriorated significantly? and normal support structures are no longer enough.?

NOTE: I chatted here about teen drinking and risk taking on The Morning Show. Great topic but just need to say, I did not choose the title 'Terrible Teens'. I get to work with teens all the time and I can honestly say that there are many beautiful teens out there that are able to make wise choices and have awesome 'hands on' parents cheering them on.

2012

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